People like Dom Coccaro are why I wanted to start a publishing house in the first place. He's the kind of writer who has specific passions and his own style that everyone might not understand but everyone who “gets” is wholly endeared to. When I had my (first) mental breakdown since starting this company, he called me just about every day to check up on me. He's one of the people who can make me laugh like a child hearing a fart every single time we talk, no matter what kind of mood I'm in. He's one of the top writers I'd love to poach for our company. I intended to write this article tomorrow but I met up with Maureen tonight and was quoting one of his best roasts of me and got inspired. He's been running Random Reviews Incorporated since before I can even remember, probably longer than I've known him. Living up to his name, he reviews everything from horror movies to flavors of Mountain Dew. It's been a staple of my life since he's entered it. I implore anyone with a dick, balls, or clit to check it out.
As I mentioned earlier, the site ranges from book reviews to Matches That Time Forgot, which highlights some of Dom's favorite WWF/WWE throwdowns. It's all written in his irreverent, charmingly-archaic tone. He has his own rating systems. Instead of stars, he grades moves out of four Z'Dars (like the B-movie actor). Music is rated out of Abbaths (which is someone in metal music, I'm guessing?). Books are rated out of Verill's, like Stephen King's timeless performance of Jordy Verill in the film Creepshow. It has something for everyone and everything with taste.
So, that's my pitch for you to check out this awesome site in the flavor of Dinosaur Dracula and The Flesh Farm. I'm gonna stop sucking Dom's dick for a bit and end this on an anecdote about the time we met. He used to moderate a V-Bulletin message board on the JoBlo website. (I guess that site's still open, for some reason?) I opened a thread to review Dario Argento's Three Mothers trilogy, starting with Suspiria. He, operating under the username, Count Chocula, closed my thread and immediately opened his own in which he gave Suspiria a review that didn't result in at least a 10/10. Unbelievable. So, Count Chocula was my internet nemesis. I spent a lot of time on internet forums in high school and would regularly bring various usernames up in conversation with classmates. Due to this great offense, there was at least one full day of the eighth grade where Count Chocula was my mortal enemy (long before I got to know Dom as a person). Two years ago, I was talking to a friend I had gone to high school with (another person I would run a marathon to sign onto our label) and mentioned Dom in passing. He replied, “Count Chocula!? You still talk to that guy!?” Check out his site. I'll drop links below. Dom, write us a fucking manuscript!!
Random Reviews Incorporated: https://rrincorporated.blogspot.com/