​Ash Wednesday: Loft
Written By: Ash Catcher 

Loft

Look out, across the land nothing but the soft buzzing air. 
Hard to see on a map, back then anyone recall foursquare. 
One house rancher, just propped up another level. 
I never expected you of all people to know how to make a pretzel. 

But here up on the second story with no ground underneath. 
Reminds me of a time back when I was younger, when I had less teeth. 
Lofty housing built above a garage. 
Separate from the house, just a bit more camouflage. 

Best night sleep of my life, 
Kitchen outfitted with everything but a bread knife. 
The quiet, the lack of sound. 
Nothing in the background. 

But the uncanny sound of silence. 
Something different from all the drugs and violence. 
A place of solace, with not much to do. 
Wifi spotty, just need a permit to park my coup. 

Farmland, barnland, places that look like movie sets. 
When faced with your thoughts alone, it's like challenging yourself to chess. 
Is it the back to basics that you need, or the lack of distracting things. 
I am beyond excited to see what this next Spring brings. 



-Ash

I need to split myself into fourths. 
I know this is impossible of course. 
But if I had a me, whose only job was to cook, and keep the house clean. 
Well maybe I would have the time to go to the gym, to squeeze into those jeans,

But hey I guess that isn’t the case, because for the 4th time this week I am too tired to masturbate.
I got way too much on my plate, I guess that is because I haven’t caught you up to date. 
I skipped lunch again today, not because I wasn’t hungry, there was just no time.
Time? That construct, that thing that seems to last a lifetime. 

I have never heard it constructed that way, it almost seems fictitious.
I can't trust you if you bake anything but golden delicious. 
Split myself in 6, well if we have someone to front the 5 of us, that may just be the trick. 
I am almost out of ideas, because I am seeing the end of this wick. 

I am sure there will be days where we all go out of our minds, things are all about. 
The things one does for a breakout roll, when it is not their show, socialist clout trouts. 
Swimming up stream with nothing to tether them to their reality of make-believe. 
Where they live stream how much they have “achieved”


All without leaving their rooms. 
Well I guess you can do a lot when you don’t have to inhale exhaust fumes. 
Because your generation will never know what it’s like to commute. 
Contributing to the decaying conversation, pending on lawsuits. 

That is far too much for you to endure. 
Oh I apologize, I should have known your life story, how many weeks premature?
I am chill no big deal, just that I constantly hear screaming in my ear, 
I think it's there anyway, easy to clean up in my head, my peers are all present accounted for and here. 

Nitpicking what I do consistently. 
Micromanaging yourself is the key. 
When you do not know what to do in a state of distress. 
Just hunker down, and trust the “process” 


-Ash ​

​Written by: Ash Catcher 

Something I have acquired the past 2 years has been pretty green. I am not talking about $ but the flow has been pretty abundant, and I am thankful I am talking about house plants. They not only make the air in my house smell fantastic they're also um kinda profitable. So aside from my day job and night gigs when I am not selling things on the marketplace you may want to hit me up for your next plant baby. 

This sudden addition to my horde of things has over ruled my obsession with records, I am not sure I've bought a record in months- I don't have as many plants as I do books but it is still a very on growing process! 

Being a plant mom and of course proud cat mom [ I got a pin to prove it] requires am interesting watering schedule currently and I clocked it it takes me close to an hr to water all the plants in my house. With every other day or honestly when I remember whose kidding  I spritz. Got to make sure that soil is moist. 

They don't talk back, worst case scenario your cactus topples over and your well... you're fucked dont touch it I am pretty sure my last cactus Santiago died on my dorm room floor at the end of my senior year, I've never cried so hard in my life. It could also be the combination of starting my real adult life and the 4 year relationship between Santiago and I. It wasn't supposed to end like this! 

I love gardening but usually struggle with the commitment part one day I'll get it right. Who doesnt want to grow their own veggies there is something super satifiying about growing soemthing yourself. A collaboration between you and the Earth. 

I am happy I am a plant parent, wasn't planned just kinda happened. 
​

- As

Post Positive Poem
Written By: Ash Catcher ​

Happy 2022! Here is the first Ash Wednesday of the New Year! I actually had some writers block on this one so I had to kinda go into some archival work! 

​
We cherry pick our opinions to further our own narratives.
What is going on in the world now, compared to a few years ago- they’re not comparable. 
Gas prices are skyrocketing, and all the tech mongrel billionaires are all trying to leave. 
 3% of the working force resigning all because refusing to Roll up your sleeve. 

But here down on earth, where the weather all arises. 
The only places open these days, the meals all come with fries. 
I am not that old, but I recall some things a bit differently. 
People were way more cognitive, present, and much more friendly. 

If I keep thinking about how things used to be, I am back longing for the 1990s. 
Technocolor outfits, all unisex because our parents were broke. 
Nowadays, technology has changed, but disposable cameras are still astronomical. 
When I do have time to watch the news, I can only manage it in small doses, because it is rather comical. 


The rent was more affordable, college was cheaper, and you only needed one income to survive. 
We have a whole generation of men that eats nothing but debt, still living with their parents, and soon to be their wives. 
If that says something, I don't know I could never really get down with multigenerational homes. 
Sure you can blame the economy, but I know it as Arrested Development syndrome. 

If the past few years couldn’t get much weirder, I swore time has become a form of capitol. 
The movements of the people at this point are nothing close to mechanical. 
We have people trapped in houses, with nothing but their abusers, and addictions. 
Yesterday's newspapers still wrapped, and unread- shit seems like science fiction.  

And god forbid you have a human emotion. 
What are you supposed to do? Take a walk in the freezing cold and listen to that song about the astronaut and the ocean. 
Bombarded with advertisements, and things that I don't need. 
Had a rough day at all your work(s), why not try a $12 salad of seaweed. 


Having a moment of intrusive thought provoking. 
There are mornings when I wake up and I can literally feel everything around me dying, and choking. 
Falling in love with the traces of you, is there something that I have missed? 
Must have had the wrong name in my phone, that is ok I changed it to Mr. Egotist. 

Social Media docent even hit my dopamine receptors like they used to, it all feels like a chore.
One that I keep putting off, because I am sick of lying to my core. 
My energy, well it's winter so it's not that miraculous, some days, or most I just feel catatonic. 
Just need a change, maybe I need to start with my closet- could use some more colors, I think that is called polychromatic. 

I am sure this is what happens 2 years in post positive 


-Ash