Ash Wednesday! Phil Street View

Written By: Ash Catcher 

Street Name: 

1. Parker: Too far for me to walk to. I'll drive to this one. 
2. Umbria: Lived here, swore I heard someone saying something about stale croutons. 
3. Flat Rock: I used to frequent, but due to flooding, and a semi salted heart I flat out refuse. 
4. Cresson: Street is way too long, best shortcut to the booze. 
5. Tower: I was walking home one day and saw someone with a  The Room Bumper Sticker, they gave me their number. I didn’t call them. 
6. Delmar: Walks this way 3 times a week, lugging Luna, blasting music, trying to overlook all the breadcrumbs. 
7. Silverwood: The place to urinate. 
8. Sharp: This street is endearing as fuck, everyone in this neighborhood rated the Barrels of Crate. 
9. Fountain: Closed forever I am not so sure? Made it hard to vote, I wouldn’t know I am still Registered in Bucks Co.  
10. Smick: You Think you’re slick but I see you watching me, sipping on that 2.99 Bordeaux.  
11. Gates: Bill? You’re a pretty quiet area, swore I’ve parked around you. 
12. Fowler: TIny little weirdo, concrete jungle, puzzles, labyrinths, lard lord grubbers, high wire hanging shoes.  
13. Sheldon: Some late nights on this street a few years back, now whenever I see this street sign, I a, haunted by the past. 
14. Wilde: This has been quite the ride, been described as a lot of things, but I would never say half- assed.  
15. Hermitage: Entering some predestined BS, living with a bunch of 20 something addicts, what a fucking reality show. 
16. Dupont: It is a lonely way up to the top, but it is even lonelier at the bottom, that's not snow in the air, that is your roommate's stash of blow. 
17. Greenough: Never been on this one, to what I can recall, got rid of everyone in my circles, water is adaptable and can be any shape.  
18. Canton: I got a co-worker on the street, young and old Scott and Brian to beat, unpaved pathways, decaying landscapes.  
19. Lemonte: Looped into Delmar, I have been on this route the sunsets are subliminal, I feel like I can hear the sound of the sun. 
20.  Baker: Bridgenics, and bike rides, I can't seem to shake this route, easy 5 miles, surrounded by tombstones, treating it as a dry-run.  
21. High:  What I wish I could be now, connection less than 500 ft away, Uber Weeds.  
22. Mallory: The girl who asked me out minutes after you broke my heart. I see her online from time to time, then I go back to indeed.  
23. Krams: Smushed between Silverwood, bronze at best. Overlook this little road, but I am more impressed with its garden wall. 
24. Station: That Manayunk jug handle, thing is curved like some guys morals I used to know, crooked kettle souls 8 Ball (black)  
25. Pensdale: A long one, another go to route. Beating the shit out of the pavement, so I do not get too stressed out.  
26. Main: The place of employment, I sadly stay devout. 
27. Ritchie: Brandon, odd enough, has a pretty good deli, matte black walls, house dead sandwich pig meats.  
28. Green: I long as dangerous street, dead raccoon by my car, I named him Randy, I should really say a few words over him, wrap him in a sheet.  
29. Cinnaminson: Is this a type of spice? If so, I need it. Spicy as heck, cooking lady- I have this awesome bbq rub for tofu.  
30. Davis: Sounds too much like David, Dave…. Star Wars… absent parents…. Rouge Who?  
31. Conarroe: One of my first readings was on this street, then I started connecting the intuitive dots, of course they make a repent- a- gram. 
32. Gay: I am a little that I blame it on my mother’s side, She grew up around all boys, and I am the way I am because of how my Dad says the word Jam.
33. Levering: What is the deal with that new salon in the middle of the neighborhood? Sheesh Christ, what an eyesore. 
34. Grape: The Room is getting too cramped now, how about you play at another place, like the shore?  
35. Cotton: Super odd and kinda fuzzy, this street pops up, then floats off to somewhere heavenly.  
36. Boone: I dwell here primarily. 
37. Leverington: A main road to some, a street to others, this guy sucks to walk up on, but I’ll be damned if I do that latter. 
38. Roxborough: The place where this stage play is set, the scene we are all mad here, like the hatter. 
39. Rector: I won’t even say it. 
40. Churchview: This street is steep, but the parking is free, that means no more 26 dollar parking ticket fees. 
41. Terrace: Bakery, same coffee as I have during the week, become a walking spokeswoman for La Colombe, guess that is a Philly thing.  
42. St Davids: On the way Bridge Walk bound, weird churches converted into apartments, have we valued Real estate over God? 
43. Baldwin: Pretty sure he shot that lady, white men always walk away to the sound of applause. 
44. Apple: Of my eyes I got a parking ticket here, 3 exactly, the neighbor said I could leave my car here, whelp they lied. 
45. Shurs: My brother lived off this street for a hot minute then jumped ship, we went crazy that year at our house for pride. 
46. Kingsley: Wooed the cat next door to me, now he is sitting in my lap rocking retirement.  
47. Carson: Another place of dwells, it is an interesting environment. 
48. Markle: I know a bunch of these, but there are no Markles on this street. 
49. Salaignac: Sounds like a type of drink in the 1920s, or a brand of Cream of Wheat. 
50. Hermit: Is what I kinda have become, sick of hiding my face for no damn reason how many years has it been now?
51. Ridge: Holy fucking shit did we just pass a few Cows? 
52. Manayunk: Purgatory for people in their Twenties. 
53. Seville: At the top of the hill, read between the lines, and parenthesis. 
54. Maiden: Ironclad. 
55. Dawson: Creek, I laugh and people who spend time with their dads. 
56. Mansion: Something I would build in the Sims. 
57. Haines: Breaks off into little concrete heavy limbs.  
58. Wright: Wrong I guess this street is fine, its cramped and small, and a one way street.  
59. Jamestown: I went to this town with Rae.  
60. Ripka: Snagged some stuff to sell, and a lot of pillows and paint. 
61. Pechin: Every Wednesday I go to Sal Val, I am trying to find more mugs.  
62. Cross: Parked on this street, should have known you were hiding drugs. 
63. Fleming: RIP take out pasta. 

- Ash Catcher