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Ash Wednesday! Acquire Info, Fuck Your Sensitivity

3/24/2021

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Ash Catcher.

Here is something that I had to to be the littlest bit high to come into realization. ( I am typing this with one hand to, my cat is heck a needy this morning) I cringe at the thought of me have graduated college almost 10 years ago, some people think I have very little to show for it- I am not focusing on those people today- instead I am more focused on how much I have learned outside of a state instituted learning facility. You’re right that was a Suicidal Tendencies reference, that's literally the best way I can sort of describe my time at college. 

​
I learned a lot academically, but nothing I learned in college really prepared me for daily life struggles. I am an artist. I didn’t take any personal finances, I know zilch about the stock market, nor do I really care to. I guess really the only useful thing I did learn and graced my semi developed adult brain with was learning, and becoming moderately good at learning another language. 
Learning Russian, while I am no way not the best opened a lot of doors for me, I started teaching at Russian speaking school, got a real taste for the culture, literally I am mostly sour cream, if you have had a late night diner run with me you know Betty, at Suburban Diner just hands that shit out to me. Learning Russian sparked something else in me too, it was that I noticed I was never satisfied. If I finished a project, as soon as I handed it in- instant regret, I would always say to myself I can do better, I can push more, I can be more. My take on college was much more serious than in high school, I did not give two flying fucks about high school. However I felt like my parents had so much expectation for me to even attend college that I do what I do with most things…. I rush through them. I don't take my time, I feel like sometimes if I can get away with the bare min I will. Learning in a classroom isn’t for everyone, trust me I have been on both sides of that smart board I know. 
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Nowadays, I obtain most of my information from reading. Yes like from a book, but also I am on Reddit way too much-  But yea books,  I have a lot of those and in an enormous variety of different topics, and sizes. To anyone who had the displeasure of helping me move, I know they’re heavy, and yes I do have a Barnes and Noble Membership still, why, do you need to borrow it? Recently I have been even more into spirituality, I guess more so than I used to be, I am not 100% cause you know this could be the all up in my head, and then again maybe not? I see WAY too many synchronicities, repeating patterns, and odd things happening around me. My town is weird as shit, and I am like semi-conscious at this point that there is something bigger going on- I am also a little bit stir crazy being at home on my only day off for the next two weeks, ya girls got some grinding to do- literally I’ll be grinding coffee for the next 2 weeks haha. 

Back to it Ash- Some would say that learning is a relatively permanent change in behavior, I disagree I think if you don't contradict yourself are you 1: real? And 2: are you really learning if you aren’t constantly changing your view on something due to what you just read. I value peoples in-site, and yes I get caught up in the comment section, I think people are both endearing, and severely misguided. I love that. But seriously the way I choose to educate myself post Malone college has very little to do with my IQ. Not sure what it is up to now, but if it is anything like my credit score we may be in business! I do like the fact I have broken a DISC test 3 times running, that made me feel semi special, and also crying into a personal Ben & Jerrys. I can't understand the horror! I was never good at fitting into boxes. I have no time for personal hang ups, and I certainly prioritize myself, my home, and now my cat? ​
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Real quick I am going to throw this out there: 
 
Some quick ways to learn something new as you go about your day are: 
  1. Watch a quick video: I have the attention span of well…. A squirrel, but the best way I can, and like to learn is to watch something. I am always watching a youtube video, or a documentary about something, currently I have on my queue is  Cowspiracy. I am not jazzed to learn about the unethical practices that America has adopted over the course of well forever, but I do love cows, and have been known to participate in a drive by MOO every now and again. If you have ever mooed at a cow and they moo back at you. I can't even begin to address what kind of high that is 
  2. I attend lectures, well I would even when I graduated from West Chester, I would still go back to listen, and even partake in a few of my women and gender studies class lectures. I have even spoken at the College of New Jersey about topics including, but not limited to sexuality, gender, rape culture, and my personal favorite the wage gap.  Now with Covid I am in a lot more chat rooms, and groups on facebook, with like minded interests, but being in an auditorium addressing hundreds of women was also pretty cool too. 
  3. Take a Field Trip: I am an avid field tripper I guess you could say: I have everything I ever need in my backpack, and with a full water bottle, and a charged phone I am pretty much fearless when it comes to in the field work. Recently I have been into mushrooms. So naturally I am out there in the fucking woods looking for  some chicken of the woods. I know I’ll find something even if it is one measly truffle. 
  4. I go to the library. Yes I still do this, even if it is one of the small mailbox ones, I love different colored books recently and have been making my bookshelf “rainbowie” as fuck. 
  5. I learn in small sprints: little bits of info to chew on and then I go do something else, then go about my day. I got other shit to do. 

See you next Wednesday 

-Ash Catcher 
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