1+1 Is Summoning Written by Ash Wednesday Making lateral moves but still painfully parallel playing Who I am I kidding I am trying to distract and distance myself daily But for some reason we find ourselves back in this weird little situation It's a repeating cycle There is too much history and character defamation And I don't have enough drugs to forget your Stupid smirk tonight Been painstakingly sober and not happy about it Because I am dying to let it all out and hate this silent overtime This overtune is a repetitive one And I am not sure if I can stomach you or your friends songs anymore Always coming up unannounced in my life and playlists What is this that you call this I say seridopudous. But there is only so much dopamine I can stomach tonight. I can't bring myself to bring myself to another boiling point or summon up those burried feelings again Like the rain that's been ruining my yard time I can't wait to get off this earth It's the same old feelings and lines This monotonous meaningless conversations Only breed frustration and conditioning I want to try and make sure that I am worth saving Only so much you can do in this form I am not sure if I got this down this life time But for good measuring I am sure. That 1 + 1 is summoning
I think I can feel something coming Not sure if it's another person, entity, or feeling But I am so sick and tired of trying to justify some things and meaning. There isn't enough healing and stirring with myself And trying to forgive and move forward I am so sick of trying to bury past people who Won't just fucking rot in the earth or something along those lines. 1+1 is summoning Something from nothing first and foremost I am not going to keep trying To unearth something that is broken and rotting. Springing renew I am rejecting everything that's not for me Old patterns eclipsed staring today Did I not learn this lesson last time? A.W.
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August 2023
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